So it's finally here

The verdict is in: yes, we are in a recession. As if most of us didn't already know this, but jobless claims surged to its highest level since 1992. 

Given the fact that B's company has been laying off employees at various properties around the country left and right, this comes as no surprise. 

B's CEO sent out a memo yesterday that established a moratorium on any raises for 2009. No bonuses, no raises. The CEO himself took a 20% pay cut. Thankfully B's job does not seem to be going anywhere. No matter how dire the conditions, unless the company just outright folds, they will always need someone to do the financial reporting. So that's good. What's even better: he still has a job. So hopefully we can hold on until the storm passes.

This leads me to considering the pros and cons of a recession. Yes, there are pros, if you can manage to survive through it.

Pros:

1. Everything goes on sale. Stores that are forced to clear out their inventory are also forced to reduce their prices to the appropriate price point, which can sometimes mean giving things away almost for free. 

Case in point: Old Navy just had a sale where they were literally selling their scarves and hats for $1. Need a scarf or hat? Well, no, I don't, not personally, but I'm sure many who are struggling are happy to have such a price. When you factor in cost to produce and transport, ON is barely making anything on those hats and scarves. But if you happen to have money to shop: SCORE!

2. Hm....well, what's number 2? Oh, okay, energy prices are going down. They aren't going down for good reasons. Prices are declining because even though OPEC decreased its production, there is still a surplus of oil available due to weak demand around the world. So, if you wanted to go on a road trip, now is the time to do it. Do you have your passport ready, if you still have a job?

3. Traveling will hopefully get cheaper. I don't have any proof to back up this theory, but business who want to just have customers will be forced to lower prices. There are businesses who will keep their prices arbitrarily inflated, but the companies who fail to reduce their prices will suffer more than those who react accordingly. 

In essence, if you are still fortunate to have an income, then these are the things to be happy about: sales!

I could list out the cons, but don't we pretty much know what they are? Job losses, increased health care costs because of people losing health insurance when they lose jobs, rising foreclosures, fewer available loans to help those who need to get by, etc. It's depressing. But these are not things we need to dwell on.

What to do, what to do

I haven't gone to my gym since August, which is when school started. I like my gym. It's right on the water, so when I am on the treadmill I enjoy watching the boats glide gently through the waterway, the occasional bird swooping down to catch a fish and then flying on. 

Do I particularly enjoy going to the gym? No. But I like this gym. 

It costs $43/mo. In the past two months I have given them my money without getting anything out of it. I use it the most during the summer, if it's really hot out, and during the winter, if it's cold out. 

I much prefer going on walks outside, but for some reason, ever since I was little, my lungs literally hurt when I try to breathe in the cold air. I don't know if it's just acclimation or what, but I know that exercising outside when it's colder than 50 is a miserable experience for me. 

So I have been toying with the idea of canceling my membership. But I don't want to because I know it's my own fault for not using it enough lately. I had wanted to get to the gym on a regular basis this year, but it hasn't happened. Teaching all subjects for 5th graders demands quite a bit of time, and sometimes, no matter how hard I try, it's 5:00 before I know it, and by that time the gym is crowded and you can't get on the machines you want, which also sucks.

So now I am still left with the question: do I quit and then rejoin if I miss it, or should I just try even harder to get out of school at a decent time so that I am competing for machines with other women? 

Argh

TMI warning, perhaps.

Sometimes I dislike myself intensely. It's not that I don't like who I am, but I really hate my hormones when I am either at the end or middle of my 28 days. Today is a prime example. 

It's the middle of the month (actually day 11 for me), and today we went to go look at sofas. I actually really liked several sofas, and he kinda liked a few, and really liked none. We spent a while in there, and I felt like he was rushing us through. It turns out he was rushing us through because he didn't really like the place,  but he didn't communicate that to me. 

Anyway, I spent a few moments talking to a sales clerk about their process, and when we were finished, B approached me in a panicked way and I asked if he liked anything in there, and he said that he didn't. Great. I wasted my time looking at everything when apparently he had decided early on that he didn't like their stuff. So I was mad a) because we wasted our time b) I actually did like a few things and c) he didn't appear to be concerned about what I thought. In hindsight, he really didn't need to ask because I said "Oh, I like this one." But my ovaries didn't realize this, and I got really upset with him. 

It wasn't about sofas, but he thinks it was. I was upset with him because I didn't feel as though my thoughts were heard or taken into consideration. That rang a few other bells, and before I knew it, we're standing in our house and I am crying and carrying on about how I feel he doesn't care to know what I think about things, and what he says is what goes. None of this is true, but you can't tell my emotional self that it's not true. 

So an hour later we both vented our frustrations, and he went to a friend's house to play XBOX (he's addicted to that little white box with its green eye). I took a bath, sang my little heart out while bubbles piled around me, and then clarity came. I was a little crazy. And I'm going to have to apologize. And I really dislike my hormones. 

Crap.

Goals

I'm trying to set some goals for things I want to do. 

1. Go to London and Paris in June. It won't be a cheap trip, but it will be worth it. If we start a family, then who knows when we'll get to travel again. Yes, I want to take kids along, but that's many years down the road. I want to do it now before I have much energy,  in the form of small bodies in need of mom, taken from me.

2. Sign up for an 8K race in March. The first meeting to start training is coming up on November 22nd. I have no intention of actually "racing," but I do think having something to run/walk for is a good idea.

Quoth the Palin

From an AP Report:

Said Palin on Friday: "The Alaska voters and me not be a dictator, won't be telling anyone what do to."

'Dat's right. An' I ain' no swagga jacka neither.

Number Game

Over the summer I started working out. I had neglected to stay in shape in my first year of marriage, and so last summer it was my primary goal to lose some inches and pounds. I am happy to report that I have lost about 1.5 inches from my hips and thighs, and about an inch from my arms. The strange thing is that this shrinkage began over the summer, but I didn't lose any weight. I remained at around 139. Lately I haven't worked out as much simply because I have been very busy during the week. I have noticed that my muscle tone is not so great....and guess what! I lost weight! So, I think I would like to be toned, even if it means putting on pounds of muscle. I don't want to be skinny and soft. I'd rather be slimmer and toned, personally. :)

What Went Wrong

So I'm seeing analyses of what happened for McCain on the news. Before I read what everyone else thinks, I'll put my thoughts out there.

1. Sarah Palin. More than anything else with McCain, Palin was the reason I had firmly decided not to go for McCain.

2. Preaching to the Choir. In all of the attack ads and speeches made by both McCain and Palin, not once did they say anything that would reach out across the aisle, so to speak, that would appeal to other voters who were not already part of their base. Many times, I felt as though I was just watching them go by the old Republican playbook, which is to say that all Democrats are Godless Socialists who want to tax and spend and love big governments. Oh, and also: 9/11 and act on all of your fears. Oh, and the terrorists hate us for our freedom. Don'cha know?

3. I never felt like McCain's campaign had any clear strategy for winning. It seemed as though they changed course on a daily basis, and tried everything they could. The only problem is there was no consistency with their message, other than "Maverick." 

4. Speaking of Reagan does little to get our pulses going. McCain often referred to the 80s, when many of us were either kids, or we don't have such great political memories of those times. It doesn't take much to remember all of the crap that happened back then.

5. Hate and fear. I REALLY disliked Sarah Palin's attacks of "liberals." I know McCain almost switched parties in 2001, but Palin did just about everything she could to make herself and her party look like a bunch of white, narrow-minded bigots. Even though I know that's not true, I believe she did a lot of damage to her party, and to McCain. 

6. McCain's campaign was not on the ground early enough. Because of the contentious battle fir the Democratic ticket, Obama had his people in VA back in January, if not earlier. McCain finally set up camp here in July. 7 months is an eternity in campaign life. I believe he was way too late.

7. In 2004 Kerry started running out of money, so he pulled his campaign offices out in VA and one other state. I wanted to volunteer for him, only to find that the offices were being closed down! So when I saw McCain doing the same thing, I knew he was in trouble. If anything, he should have targeted the blue states as well, and tried his hardest to get his voice out. Obama was here many times in the past few weeks. It turned out that my state was pretty important in this election.

So, that's what I think went wrong. I don't dislike McCain. I just intensely dislike Palin. Plus, it feels pretty cool to be a part of history.

Amazed

I hoped. 

But I didn't believe it would happen. 

I was wrong.

Barack Obama just won the presidency. 

It's cool to be a part of history--and a good part at that.

Several thoughts for today

1. When B and I have kids, our social lives will inevitably change. We won't necessarily lose our current friends who do not have children, but more than likely we will hang out with our friends who do have children. We need to be on their good graces for when the time comes. B said as much yesterday when we were talking about our friends.

2. I don't want to have a boy with the same name as my husband. We were discussing kids and names, and he said "Little B." I apologized and told him that it was enough to have to call out his name, and I didn't want to have to double the efforts on calling his name. I know it's an homage to the father to name the first son after the dad, but I just can't do it, if we do have a boy one day. And I can also say that the name will definitely NOT be Magnum. I hope we have a girl, whenever we do have children. (And I am afraid that we won't be able to have children.)

3. I met a couple that has a divorce in its future. I suppose I've been around dysfunctional parents enough to know what's coming down the road. I feel badly for their kids, but I can see trouble coming. You know something's up when the mother looks at her daughter's teacher and says, "I don't have a problem, but her father is the one who has the problem," after which she tightly smiles at her husband and he narrowly grimaces back. Yikes. Poor little girl. I know these silent fights all too well. I learned all of the call signs long ago.

4. Regarding Facebook. I find it odd that there are people out there who literally "friend," every single person they've ever known, whether or not they are actually "friends," with each other. Moreover, some of those "friends," were never friends at all. I suppose popularity is all in the numbers, but when all is said and done, does it really matter how many friends you had on Facebook? I don't think so, but I know one guy that literally has 1,200 friends on FB. I am one of them, and I know that although he was a social acquaintance, he was never a friend, per se. I've been tempted to add all of the people that I actually know, which would bump my numbers up to well over 100, at least, but somehow I just feel weird about actually doing it. Maybe this is just a manifestation of my shyness, and a manifestation of other people's outgoing nature. I'm not sure, but I haven't decided what I should do.

5. Cookies and cream brownies are good. Damn good.

'Nuff said.

The Changing by One Man

Yesterday I heard a rhetorical question that I am sure has been asked around the country as we approach Election Day. "How can one man really change things, anyway?" The cynical, apathetic side of me agrees. But then I think of a video that is on YouTube. 

It talks about the greatest people in history and the changes they made in society that changes our world. Each of these people were taunted, told they couldn't do what they want to do. The video shows Michael Jordan, Thomas Edison, Walt Disney, Lincoln and Lucille Ball as several examples of people who were told to give up. They were told that they were stupid or couldn't achieve. Lincoln ran for senate EIGHT times before he actually won. 

Then I come back to the question, "How can any one person change anything?" Ask that to Alexander Graham Bell, without whom we would not have phones, cell phones, text messaging, etc. Ask that to Einstien, who revolutionized physics as the world knew it. Ask that to any of the people who have changed our world forever, and although I doubt they realized the impact they were making, I doubt they let the voices of the cynics rule their thoughts and actions. To be sure, there were those who were trying to do the same thing, and so they were not the very first ones to do it (Walt Disney was not the first animator to put sound to his films). They were just the first ones to stand up to the opposition and spoke up louder than the others. Their message was the clearest and the most meaningful to the most people.

Yes, one person can make a difference. Yes, one person can change things. The changes are often not seen for years, if not decades, but yes, one person can change the world. They are the ones who fight and don't listen to all of the naysayers. They are the ones who believe in themselves, even when no one else believes in them.