Costumes Circa 1981

Ah, yes, Halloween. It is arriving soon, and thankfully it will be over soon. 

My classroom has been adorned in pumpkins and fall decor since the beginning of the month. Today we watched "It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown," as a reward for good behavior (and quite honestly a reward for me, too). 

We have a Halloween party on Friday, and I can honestly say that I am SO happy it's on a Friday. Kids are no good for school on a sugar hangover from Halloween. They come into class with bags of candy for snacks, which I (yes, the mean teacher) allow them to have only one piece, and the rest are put away for safe eating on the bus and at home. Yes, I am happy it's on a Friday this year. 

What is interesting is that I don't remember this holiday being such a big deal when I was a kid. Sure, we had parties and costumes, but that was all outside of school. We didn't have Halloween parties, especially in Jerry Fallwell land, and we most certainly did not have elaborate costumes, although I do remember one kid dressing up like a coo-coo clock, and I thought that was so creative, but that was at a party that I had when I was in the second grade. 

Incidentally, I learned how to pluralize nouns then because I wanted to make signs that said Careful! Bumps! for the party, and  I put an apostrophe in the word BUMPS,  and my mother made me redo the sign. I learned then that plural words do not have apostrophes, and if you make that mistake, undoing it can take forever!

Buying a costume back then wasn't very complicated. You had a mask and a plastic  smock-like robe, painted to look like the body of whoever your character was supposed to be. We picked out our cheap costumes at a local drug store, went home and eagerly took them out well before the righteous day, and slapped those flimsy plastic masks on our faces. I can still feel the snap of the rubber band attached to mask onto my fine brown hair. My poor hair was snapped and broken each time I put on my mask. 

As I peered out of the eyeholes I could feel my breath, hot and sticky on the plastic mask.  Somehow, I never quite felt like the character I was supposed to be. Even though costumes weren't nearly as complicated as they can be today, I never really felt good about those costumes; which I suppose is why my mother started to sew my own costumes, and why those sewn costumes were re-used over and over again. We were green before green was in. 

It is definitely true that Halloween is so much more complicated than it ever was before. But at least kids today don't have to wear those cheap costumes. They have alternatives and choices--perhaps too many. I wonder what tales kids of today will tell their kids. Will they tell of simpler times, or will they reflect on a time of having more than they do at that time? I don't know. But I do know I wish I had a picture to remind me. For now, these memories stay etched in my mind, laid to show in this little blog about Halloween.

Take me back....

Today I had a blast from the past and it was awesome.  It was library day, and one of my kids brought his Leggo catalog with him to view with his friends. On the back cover of the catalog there was an impossibly large Leggo construction of the Taj Mahal. Just looking at the picture brought back memories of pain in my fingertips from pinching together tiny Leggo blocks when I was a kid. I asked one of my students if building with Leggos ever hurts his fingers. He said that his fingers didn't hurt, but that is because of this new-fangled lever-like device that allows you to pry the pieces apart without suffering the burns from pressing those tiny pieces together. I have to admit, I did not like Leggos because they hurt my fingers too much. I suppose I am not the only one, or else they wouldn't have come up with the handy-dandy lever. 

The kids flicked through the pages of the catalog and I stopped them when they came to the Star Wars toys. Just the mere mention of Star Wars sends me back to my childhood. I was not a girl who played with baby dolls. I had stuffed animals (and could never get rid of a single one in all of my years--I've donated, but even today I have my most favorite stuffies tucked away in a trunk for safekeeping) and I had Barbies, but never baby dolls. I also loved the toys that boys played with. He-Man. I had She-Ra and my best boy friend had He-Man and we played with our figurines together. Construx.  But Star Wars falls into a whole separate category. 

When I saw the page of Star Wars models, I began to tell the boys about all of the Star Wars things I had. At first, they were fairly nonchalant. I told them I loved R2-D2 when I was little. But then I had them in the palm of my hand when I told them I had the Millennium Falcon. Their eyes widened with disbelief. How could their teacher own such a thing? They pointed to one of the giant Storm Trooper transports from Empire Strikes Back, thinking that I didn't know what it was. They told me that it makes noises and was really cool. I proudly informed them that I had one, and it took 6 D batteries and made noises. Then more bombs dropped when I told them about being the proud owner of an Eewok village. They exclaimed "YOU HAD AN EEWOK VILLAGE? THOSE ARE REALLY RARE!" I nodded and said, "Yep, and I even had Yoda's little hut that he lived in."

I am now a god.

Who knew teachers could be so cool?

Food for Thought

A colleague of mine just got a bad grade on a class she is taking. I don't know what class it was for, but for second I thought about when I was in college I got an F on the first part of this paper I had to write for a class in "Research Methods in Political Science." Snooze. I was so mortified by my failing grade (I had never gotten anything below a B in college on my papers); in class I sat and bawled. And then I was pissed. So I fought back and got an A on the rest of the paper. When I was a student teacher my final evaluation was satisfactory, but it was not as good as I would have liked. I had a terrible student teaching experience and hated that my poor cooperating teacher essentially screwed me over by not providing any guidance during my student teaching. So I got pissed, and I was determined to overcome that evaluation. My professional teaching experience has gone well in comparison to that first amateur attempt at teaching.

I wonder, when one fails, is it normal to get mad like I do? I don't know if my feistiness is always a good thing (ask my husband), but I think being feisty comes in handy. I suppose I could just roll up into a little ball and slide away, but instead, I become angry. I supposed it's a general feeling of "F You" to the person who graded me, and a determination to prove him or her, and myself, wrong. But is this normal? I don't know.

Kids think the darnedest things...

This morning I had a little talk my kids about doing their classroom jobs. I told them that I am not going to remind them to do their assigned jobs. If they want to be rewarded for doing their jobs, then they need to take the initiative to do the work. Here's how the conversation went:

Me: Now, I don't have anyone to tell me to do my job. No one tells me to plan my lessons. No one tells me how to teach you guys. I know what I am supposed to teach, but how I do it is up to me.

Student: Really? No one tells you?

Me: Really.

Student: But doesn't Mrs P (principal) tell you what sheets to COPY?

Me: Uh, no.

Student: I always thought Mrs P told you all what to use and what not to use.

Okay, apparently my principal doesn't tell me what to teach, but she does make me run copies of things.

Later on in the conversation we rambled on to how the kids were placed into each class.

Student: So you didn't get to choose who was in your class?

Me: No.

Student: So you have no idea who you're getting? 

Me: No idea.

Student:So who chooses?

Student 2: I thought a computer just ran a list and placed each group. (I'm thinking they think this because there is a computer generated list that is printed out in August.)

Me: No, what actually happens is your 4th grade teacher has a stack of cards with your name on it, and they literally shuffle the cards and put each name under each teacher for the next grade. They choose who goes into each class. You're in this room for a reason because they try to match up personalities of students and teachers. 

DEAD SILENCE. Obviously this is a total revelation. I wish I could say we had a more sophisticated way of doing this, and I'm sure the computer does it in middle and high school, but in elementary, it's much more rudimentary.

I wonder what else kids think about the world in general.

Playing Hooky Has Its Rewards

On Friday I went and got a massage, but I didn't go to school. I go to this little hole in the wall place that is decently priced. I paid $55 for an hour massage. Well, on the plus side of it, I am now even more flexible than I was when I went in. On the negative side of it, they discovered an injury in my lower back right around my right hip. 

Apparently I tore a tendon down there and have been compensating for it for years now. I'm actually suspicious that I may have injured it when I was about 13. I used to play basketball and when I charged the court I could feel my hips zig zagging their way as I ran furiously to keep the ball in my control. Unfortunately, I think I probably ripped the tendons as I ran. I am apparently double-jointed in my hips as well, and according to my massage therapist, I am also more likely to really hurt myself. So we fast forward 15 years and I am laying on the massage table with the therapist asking rhetorically "what is this?". 

Saturday was a painful day. When I woke I could feel tension in my back and I knew it would be a bad day; which is really too bad because I was supposed to go to see my dad.

Yesterday wasn't so bad. I heard tendons popping, but there was no pain. 

Today I went on a three mile walk which took me about 45 mins. When I got to the point where I turn around I was able to bend down and put my hands on the ground with my legs almost straight! Yay!

So, although my massage discovered an old problem, I am thrilled that I can now bend down without pain, and for the first time in a long time, I did not have any muscle pain in my abs as I walked. Now that is a valuable day off. :) 

I Always Knew

That I liked Colin Powell. I've been a fan of his for at least 12 years. This may come as a surprise to some, but as I have said in the past, I am not strictly Democrat or Republican. I have always labeled myself an independent because it allows me to vote on the issues and not for the party. So yes, I have liked him for a long time. And now, he has not let me down. Thank you, Colin Powell, for saying what has needed to be said, for a very long time.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27265369

I also want to say that when the Iraq War first started, I was naive to think that my country's leader would not lead us astray. In my heart, I did not feel that it was the right thing to do, but from everything I heard and saw on TV, I supported it in the beginning. Colin Powell was the main reason why I supported it. He presented "evidence," to suggest that WMDs were being produced in Iraq (which we now know was just a cover to deter Iran from attacking Iraq), and so I trusted. Then we all found out that the evidence had been falsified by other countries who wanted vengeance against Iraq, and the US was once again used as a tool between two other countries. How badly I felt for Colin Powell! Could you imagine going before the world's leaders, presenting them with evidence that you believe to be real, only to find out that you were given false information? I can't even imagine being in that situation. But I do believe that ever since he was wronged, he has been trying to find a way to do the right thing. So once again, I thank him for saying what needed to be said. 

I am so tired of this culture of hate and fear that has been propagated by the right wing. I am so tired of people failing to admit that there are more than two sides to every story. There are countless sides to a story, especially when you are dealing with foreign policy. I remember writing papers on the CIA for a foreign policy class at JMU, and I kept researching the news on a daily basis (I believe the paper was about Cuba), and when I finally had to print the paper, I had to put an editorial note in it to say that the information I presented could have changed, because information changes on a second-by-second basis. If we don't treat the world as an ever changing, living organism, the our policies will not be effective. 

To be sure, I cannot say that both sides haven't failed to see the multitudes of perspectives existent in this world, but I can say that I believe that one side is looking to go back to the ways of Ronald Reagan, and quite frankly, I did not enjoy growing up in a world where we are all taught to be afraid of the Russians, and where the Middle East called us "The Great Satan."(Yes, I know, I was only a kid, but those who know me know that I have a good memory--almost too good.) Those were NOT fun times. Sure, people made a ton of money, but I very clearly remember the hostage crises of the early to mid-80s, and I do NOT want more of those. I did not particularly enjoy the thought of a whole region of people hating me just because I was an American, and I am sure that Muslims feel the same way in their own countries, including the US. Yes, there are extremists in those countries, just as there are extremists right here in the US.

There is a danger in failing to see the other side's point of view. If we ignore what other people think and feel, then we will not make real, true and lasting progress in this world. We will continue to find ourselves in wars and fights where neither side is right and everyone is wrong. I can only pray that we can begin, as a nation, to move forward and work on solutions, and stop fear-mongering for our own political gains. 

***

Can we just get this election over with? I don't dislike either of the candidates (but I really dislike Palin), but I am very tired of both campaigns. 

Opining on the Economy

For the past year I have been reading reports of and hearing about the impending  recession. Month after month we all hear the same question bounced around as ubiquitously as whether or not it will rain today. Are we headed into a recession? YES!  Now let's be done with it and try to move on and work on solutions to recovering and stop worrying about whether or not it will happen, but how we will get out of it. 

I also have to say that I think the drop in the stock market is long overdue. Given the decline in the housing market over the past year, especially since the sub-prime market started to melt in August 2007, there was no real reason for the Dow to be in the 14,000 territory. Anyone who has any sense would know that that number was artificial and not likely to last. In fact, much of the holding were due to (as my understanding goes) short selling, which is what investors do when they bet that the market will go down. Once a moratorium was placed on short selling we saw a huge correction in the market, which I believe had nothing to do with the bailout plan. And, upon further research into credit default swapping, which is yet another mechanism for betting that a company will go under, how is it that so many people are surprised, when they facilitated the precipitous decline? Is it really shock, or despair that the good times are over? And also, one would have to think that as the massive sell-offs continue, the money isn't disappearing; it's just going into other markets. If you're smart, now is not the time to get into those markets, but to get into stocks. I am only hoping that whoever is managing my 401(k) is getting a good deal on the mutual funds I have. For now, I choose not to worry about my statement, because I know it's down. I also know it will go back up within 10 years, so I'm not worrying about it. 

For many, times were never really that good. Wages for many people across the country have been stagnate, if not declining, when adjusted for inflation. I am happy to say that my husband and I have been very fortunate to not experience this personally, but when I listen to the stories of what other people are going through, I know that times are not good for many people. I can most certainly say that we have felt the declining economy as gas, energy, food and insurance prices have gone up. We cab absorb them, for the most part, but I can also say that I am shopping in a grocery store that I haven't visited in years, just to save money. I can also say that I am much more conscientious about where I drive, how much I drive and how much I spend to drive. I rarely fill up my gas tank. Doing so is only depressing and not worth the gray cloud that hangs over my head after speeding away from the gas station.  On the flip side, I believe these corrections are necessary. 

As a nation we cannot go around spending blindly, taking on debts we cannot afford, all the while thinking that it doesn't matter how much we owe, as long as we make the minimum payments. Also, to be more conscientious about energy is not a bad characteristic to have. For years, Europeans have been conscientious about maintaining the cars they have so they will last for years. Their gas prices have been high for decades, and they have developed alternate routes for transportation. So that part isn't necessarily bad, it's just the impact that the prices have on manufacturing and other industries. Of course, the cost is passed on to the consumer, and so we all feel that pain. 

Why I Love

My family:

Barry: because he is there for me whenever I need him, even when I think I don't need him.

My sister: because she is the only girl who knows me better than any other girl. I don't think I would have survived my parents if we didn't have each other. I miss her so much.

Paul (BIL): because I actually understand him more than he realizes, and because I have known him for so long that he really is like a brother to me. 

Bunny: because she is so much like my sister and I, and I love watching her grow up.

Tito: he has the kindest heart I have seen in a little boy.

Cole: because everything is wonderful to him.

My Dad: because he was there to pick me up when my mom dropped me (metaphorically). He needs me.

My Aunt: because she is one of the kindest people I have ever met. Who else sits down to write checks out to charities?

My Uncle: because I know him better than he thinks, for he is like my husband (but Barry does chores).

My cousin JR: Because even though he had cancer during his childhood, he meets life with excitement and enthusiasm and makes life exciting and worthwhile.

My other two cousins: because they are very kind and always on my side.

My newly discovered cousin: because she is so much like my mother's best side (from what she writes), but without any of the crazy (at least not as far as I know! Ha!).

My closest friends:

Ash: because even though I disagree with her political views, she is a great friend and any girl is lucky to have her on her side. 

Val: because she is interesting, deep and compassionate.

Mel: because she is like my sister, only not so stable. We lose touch now and then, but I know that we'll talk like we just went hiking on my farm just the other day whenever we do talk. Plus, she's an only child and she needs me.

Holly: she radiates warmth.

Devan: because she is smart, funny, philosophical and nerdy, just like me. :)

Marge: because even though she is out there, she changed my ways of working with people, and she taught me how to have fun in the most dire of situations.

Katie: because she and I are so much alike, and I had forgotten after all these years!

Now: you try it. Who do you love? Why?

On the upside

Today I actually felt pretty good about what I am doing with my kids in class. After school two other teachers and I sat down to look at what we were going to teach this month and the next, and the coolest part was that they were both clambering over my materials to use with their kids. I believe that the key to effective teaching is not thinking about WHAT we teach, but HOW we teach. Coinciding with this belief is the idea that I have to make their learning engaging, authentic and not contrived. Now of course we could all argue that much of learning is contrived, but in actuality, I always tell my kids why they are learning what they are learning. I think that kids deserve to have justification for what they are learning. So, when I teach them, for me, it's not about the what, but its about the how. So it actually felt nice to have other teachers trying to grab what I had and use my materials in their rooms. I could be territorial and protective, but I think it's cool to see this happen! That, and it's very gratifying. :)  

A Wonderful Mother

That's the title of a book I'm going to write one day. 

Essential underlying message: when you meet a so-called "wonderful mother," and you have to work with her on a regular basis, take plenty of aspirin, and make sure to get some rest, because she can be very tiring.

Interpret that as you like.

And for what it's worth, I don't aspire to be a wonderful mom. I just want to be a mom who does her best, and tries to guide her kids in the right direction, but doesn't necessarily try to control the outcome of everything in her children's lives. That is very tiresome.

I got an e-mail from a parent today who was concerned that her son got an S+ on his PROGRESS REPORT for citizenship. She was worried that getting an S+ might mean that he wouldn't be accepted into a magnet school next year. Give me a freaking break. First of all, her son is no angel. He is rude and condescending. The fact that I gave him an S+ means I am a very nice teacher because the kid is not very nice and he puts down other kids and me! Secondly, he isn't perfect. I am not perfect! I doubt I got O's for Citizenship when I was a kid. Third, it's a freaking PROGRESS REPORT. Good Lord, woman! All I can say is that she is going to be in for a rude awakening when she tries to pull this controlling bullshit next year when her son goes to middle school. She can gripe and they will nod and just walk away. Knowing that lets me sleep easier at night.

Before I met her, I was told she was "a wonderful mother."

***

I feel most sorry for her son. Poor kid. To have parents who are so tightly wound must not be an easy thing to do.

I don't GET it

Okay, I don't get two things right now. First: School of Hard Knocks Gym.

Second: the bailout bill that was just passed supposed to help alleviate the so-called credit crunch because people have not been able to take out loans due to banks and other lenders paranoia about losing their money, right? Right. So why is it that I just read a report about how *shockingly* consumer loans were down, EVEN THOUGH a group of economists predicted it would go UP? WHY WOULD THEY PREDICT IT TO GO UP WHEN THE WHOLE BAILOUT WAS BECAUSE OF TIGHTENING CREDIT?????? Tightening credit means people can't take outloans!!!! Really, I wonder how it is that we know anything, because when we actually listen to what people say, there are so many contradictions and seemingly stupid revelations. 

Also, I would also like to say that during our last bad recession in 1991 or somewhere around then, I remember hearing reporters on the news say that sales at Wal-Mart were strong, so that must be a sign that the economy was improving. Really? If more people are shopping at discount stores like Wal-Mart, doesn't that mean that their money has to go further because they have less of it? I said as much to my dad, at that time, and he just laughed because he said I had a point. I know we were shopping at Wal-Mart more, and I know we had less money than before. I doubt we were unique. 

It's coming back

Last year as the days passed and I learned more about my students, I would have stories come to my mind. I still have two stories in particular come to my mind that originated from two kids I had last year. One story is about a boy who, in his own imagination, can do no wrong, but in real life, he is a bumbling and stuttering boy who blushes at the sight of a girl and trips over his words when he has to give a report. In his imagination he is a commander of troops, lawyer to the poor and hero to all. The other story is about a girl who, at a young age, believes that she is very smart until she comes into a new school where everyone is as smart, if not smarter, than she; so then she goes through a series of events which cause her to question who she is and what she can do. In the end, she has to use her strengths to help in some yet to be determined situation.

These two kids keep playing around in my head and their stories are just faint images at this time. I had thought I would write over the summer, but when I started to write, I felt like I was working. Well, I wanted the summer off. So I didn't write and I took some time to do some soul-searching. But these two kids keep playing in my mind, and lately, I am hearing new stories emerge as I get to know my new class. I am wondering if their faint outlines will darken and if I will start to see their faces better (the boy looks a lot like Fudge in Judy Bloom's Fudge books, and I can't shake that image from my mind), and if somehow they will all intertwine to become one story. 

Today I started to write a new story in my mind as I listened to the kids talk to each other. I can't exactly say what the story is, but it's starting to emerge. It really started to come out after I asked the kids if they feel like they are over-scheduled and over-booked. Many of them nodded that they were. I advised that they speak up and let their parents know that they were too busy, if it was a problem for them. It was after that when a story began, but I can't really see it just yet. 

BTW: I am reading Andrew Clements's "No Talking" to my kids. He is such a great writer. He really has the kids' voices perfectly written in his books. 

Also, sometimes I wonder if the kids can tell that I'm lost in my thoughts sometimes when they are with me. I hear what they say and I talk with them, but at the same time, I start to think about stories and books, and I doubt they have a clue; but sometimes I wonder. 

The Time Has Come

Ladies:

Yes, yes, I know. Caring about politics isn't cool. Many girls in my class don't care about Social Studies, even though I try my damnedest to get them to care.

But here's what I have to say: it is time for us to get into politics. 

We HAVE to. 

Why? Because if Sarah Palin is supposed to be the best representation for women in the US, then we do not stand a chance. If I am supposed to vote for her because she and I share the same genitalia, and because I am not smart enough to see that she is a female version of George Bush (and God forbid we have another one of IT in office), then I guess I should. But because I am more than just another woman who likes to shop, because I am someone who does like to think about things and question conventional wisdom, I will NOT vote for her. 

As a woman, I know we can do better than her. If it means that we need to roll up our sleeves and get into the ring, then so be it. But I refuse to let someone like her be a representative of ME. She is not like me. She does not share the same views as I do, and I can even tell you that I do not agree with Plessy v. Ferguson, and I really don't agree with Scott v. Sanford, even though our own Sarah Palin couldn't tell you what Supreme Court cases, aside from Roe v. Wade, she disagrees with, when questioned by Katie Couric. BTW Sarah: Plessy v. Ferguson: enforced Jim Crowe (ever hear of Separate but Equal?), Scott v. Sanford: said that slaves were property, and as such, even when moved into free states, they were STILL property, meaning once a slave, always a slave. Oh, and I have to say, I really dislike Gore v. Bush (2000). Now, I am just a teacher. What's your excuse? Get a clue.

She can sit and try to belittle people who are analytical and intellectual, and it may even work. But for me, I am insulted. As women, we should all be insulted. We are smart. We SHOULD care. We SHOULD get involved.

It's times like this when I know where I came from. It's in my blood. Political passions rise within, and I feel as though one day I should run for office. I don't know that I will have any choice but to try. I may be just a teacher, but I know we can do better than Sarah Palin. What an embarrassment!

(END RANT...and it's been a long time coming.)