Everything I knew was on the brink of collapse. The recession had hit my family hard. Combined with a total disregard for financial prudence and a weakened demand for mail order tools, my family was on the precipice of complete collapse, both financially and emotionally. It took several years for this to hit, as it did not all hit at once.
I actually remember when Wall Street crashed in 1987. The school day was normal, and my mother picked us up after school to go grocery shopping, which was a big deal for a family who lived out in the middle of nowhere. Grocery trips were not a daily occurrence; they were monthly trips that involved two carts and about four hundred dollars. Once we got home from shopping it was dark out, and I turned on the news. Back then there was no cable in our area, so I had nothing else to watch, so I watched the news. I remember them calling it Black Monday. I didn't understand what was happening, but I knew that stock brokers were losing a ton of money. I wondered if we would lose money too. From all outward appearances, everything was normal, but within 4 years I would learn that we would fall prey to Black Monday, as many others would.
In the years after Black Monday, strange things started to happen. I remember hearing a story on NPR (again, not much else available back then, so I listened to the news too) about the Japanese Yen, and I said to my father that our money was worth more than the Japanese's, and so I asked how they could buy up all of our businesses. He quickly countered my statement and told me that their money was worth much more than ours, by 7:1. For some reason, when he said this, I started to tear up. I'm not sure why, but I think it was because I didn't understand how it was possible, but I also always thought that my country was the richest, and therefore had the most valuable money. Little did I know back then. I remember seeing stories about foreign investors coming in and taking over US companies. It was also common knowledge that stock brokers were suicidal, and it was not unusual to hear a joke made about them in movies (most famously in Die Hard).
Yes, I also remember the news stories about the Savings and Loans crisis, which spawned the failure on hundreds of banks and thrifts (and, coincidentally, is how my former employer started a company--by creating a company that provided financial information about thrifts). Back then I really had no idea what was happening, but I do remember the congressional hearings (BTW: does anyone else remember the Iran-Contra Hearings on ABC? I do...they were on all of the time during my summer at home).
I sensed a change around the year 1989-1990. My father had a heart attack. The drugs he was on made him incoherent and aggressive, but we were supposed to tip toe around him and make sure he ate rubbery chicken and vegetables. I even remember making him chicken that was microwaved. I'm sure it was terrible, but I was his little girl, and I would take care of him.
During the same time my mother's irrational spending was not abating, and she wanted to go to Disney World. My dad sat down on my bed and told me of their plans. I asked him if we could really afford it, since he had been sick, and things were tighter. I wasn't even 13 at the time, and yet I pointed out this obvious fact to him. Later on he told me that their trip would be postponed for another year. I should have taken note of a 12 year old telling her parents that going on a trip wasn't very wise, but I was proud of myself for realizing this fact.
December 1990. I sat in my parent's office talking on the phone with a bubbly friend who hadn't a clue about the rest of the world. I think I was grounded, although I cannot remember why (funny, since I remember major events, but not as much about myself). On the news there was a story about how the malls were empty during the Christmas season and consumer spending was low. I remember seeing images of a few shoppers passing through with no bags in hand, as they were simply window shopping. I wondered if my parents were in the same predicament. That year our presents were far fewer than they had been in the past few years. My clothes consisted of one green sweater (I still have it) and one sweater from LL Bean. I was also given a blanket and a teddy bear in an astronaut uniform. Oh! I also got Dr. Mario. three years earlier, I was given at least 20 presents, and we went to Disney World for Christmas. Things were changing.
December 1991.
My father sold his furniture refinishing business to a former partner and decided to sell tools through mail order. He decried his profession and swore he could not do it any longer, even if it meant losing more money. I used to help him bag, weigh and label the tools to get them ready for shipping. He moved his office from a stand along building to a room in our horse barn. He bought a cordless phone that had an amazing range. That Christmas, I was given the cordless phone, wrapped in a paper bag. My father also gave my mother a white teddy bear with a red rose in its paws. She gave the bear to me, and said that he couldn't win her over with cheap presents. I took the bear and held onto it. I saw it as a gesture of effort. She saw it as a pathetic attempt to salvage their relationship. By the end of 1991, my parents' marriage was essentially over. My father slept in a separate room, while my mother kept the master bedroom. She told lies about him while he quietly tried to survive because he knew she would not be there for us in the end.
1991 was the second most dark year of my life, next to 1992 (which I will refrain from detailing in this blog). When I think about what our country is going through right now, in 2008, I wonder how many families are suffering like ours did back then. I wonder how many families are collapsing because of the financial strain they are under. Marriage is hard enough, but add kids and financial worries together, and it can be devastating. I definitely feel as though we are actually years off from the bottom, and that this is just the beginning. I pray that I am wrong. I pray that our nation rebounds. Apparently I have always been interested/concerned about money, as I have always paid attention to such matters, ever since I was 10 years old. I can only hope that my students won't have similar tales to tell when they are my age.
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